Dear Ex Best Friend

            The fact that you did not care and could hurt me so easily shows how true of a friend you actually are.  I’ve forgiven you for kissing the guy I liked, for making up a lie about me to your parents, and for blaming me as the reason we do not hang out anymore. I am tired of letting you get away with how you treat me, you do not care about anybody but yourself.  Actually, no, you only care about yourself and your boyfriend that you’ve only been dating for maybe a year now. So let’s go back to the first time you let me down as a friend.

            Eighth grade: What a great time that was!  Having all our classes together, begging our parents for sleepovers, and hanging out everyday after school.  I told you I liked this kid named Mike that I was friends with since sixth grade like you. You told me how cute that was, that we were so cute together and you were so happy and excited for me.   The last day of eighth grade, even though in the morning you told me again how cute me and Mike were, that day after school you told me you had feelings for him. I was not mad at you for that, that is not your fault.  It is what happened next that made me so upset because I knew that I would have never in a million years do anything like that to you. You told me you would not do anything because you knew how much I really liked him.  But, apparently telling me that was a complete lie and you just said it to make yourself feel better about the situation. You made out with Mike at a party the second I went home. I hung out with the both of you the entire time and the second I leave, you do that to me?  I decided to forgive you because I did not want to lose my best friend over a crush.  I should have known from that moment what a shit friend you were.  I should have not put myself in a situation to be hurt by you again.  My bad.

            Anyway, you apologized for the whole thing that happened with Mike and we continued being best friends.  We went to the same high school together and got into the same program, an accelerated course. Ninth grade we had all the same classes again,  except two, and we chose to tryout for cheerleading. We both made the team! This made us hang out a lot more often. From being in the same classes together all day to going to cheer practices to my grandpa picking us up and taking us to my house or yours, we were constantly in each others’ company.  Even our coaches for cheer that we just met knew how close we were. They even mixed us up sometimes even though we look nothing alike. Everybody in our program, on cheer, or anybody that knew us, knew that we were really close friends.  

            Tenth grade, every day, I would make a sandwich for myself and you in the morning because you were always hungry and did not eat until you got home from school.  So, at lunch, we ate the sandwiches together. The high school football games started that year and it was the first year we cheered for a team. Freshman year we just had practices because it started in the spring, not the fall.  So besides being together all day every day during the week, we were together over the weekends also because of football and basketball games. Then I decided to invite you to my dad’s house in Long Island for a weekend. You met my step-mom, my step-sister, and all our friends from the beach.  Everybody loved you and we had a great time. Your parents even came out to Long Island for dinner with my dad and step-mom. We did this a couple times over the years, you coming out and hanging out at the beach and everything. Tenth grade we also joined the Honor Society and went to a ceremony for it.  This year was also the year that I started dating my current boyfriend, Mike, the same guy from eighth grade. 

            Eleventh grade was pretty much the same as tenth grade: We had cheer camp over the summer leading up to eleventh grade for a week at our high school.  They were long, hot days with no air conditioning and my grandma made us a snack to have while we were there because she knew how much you loved her macaroni pie.  We still had the majority of our classes together junior year but we hung out a little less because of the studying we had to do for the SATs. When we did hang out, a lot of the time we did the work that was due together so it would get done and we could still be together.  We also hung out with my boyfriend and with our other friends at parties.

            Twelfth grade was when everything changed.  The summer leading up to twelfth grade you got a boyfriend.  In the beginning of the school year, we planned out our after prom plans because everything was getting booked since our school had 1000 graduating students.  You wanted a room with me, my boyfriend, you, and your boyfriend. I was not allowed to do this and told you I would rather our boyfriends room together and we can room with two other girls.  You did not like that answer because our boyfriends would not be 18 at that time and could not rent a room, but I told you they would be able to under their parents’ names like every other graduating senior was doing.  I called the motel, but they only had single rooms available so I chose that room and told you to call and get another one. You then proceeded to tell your parents that I ditched you and your boyfriend so I could have a room alone with my boyfriend which was not true at all. Your parents called my mom telling her I was a horrible friend to you and put my boyfriend before you, not caring about what we decided to do.  It was a complete lie and my mom would not let me go to after prom because she did not trust me. She did not want me staying in a room with my boyfriend and I told her I wasn’t but because of your parents call, she no longer trusted me. We talked about it and you apologized again. I forgave you again and decided to keep our great friendship.

            The year continued and we were still friends but not as close as we were.  I texted you apologizing for whatever happened even though I did nothing wrong.  I said we should put it behind us and move on and be close again. I texted you constantly asking you to hang out or do something and you would either not answer me at all or make up fake excuses.  Almost every time you made up an excuse, I would see that you were with your boyfriend because one of you posted something. Eventually after about a month of trying, I gave up on being friends with you.

            I was such a loyal friend to you.  Over and over again I forgave you no matter what shit you put me through, I was there for you.  You did not care about me at all and it really showed. I learned that maybe you can forgive someone after the first bad thing they do to you, but it depends on what that thing is.  If something happens again, maybe I should not be so quick to forgive that person. It is not fair to me, someone that tried so hard to be the best person I can be, to be treated that way.  What also hurt me the most was you telling your parents something that made them think less of me, something that was not even remotely true. Then after that whole thing happened, you saying I ditched you for my boyfriend.  You did that to me over and over again.  

            You killed our friendship and I will not be able to forgive people so easily anymore.  I will not let anybody else walk all over me and hurt me like you did. I do not need you as a friend, there are much better people out there.  But you lost somebody that truly cared about you through it all. You lost a great friend.

From,

Your Ex Best Friend